Muddling Through Motherhood

This year, I’ve got a lot to work on. Don’t get me wrong – I’m really happy with my life. I think I’ve got the work/Rowan balance right, we’re all sleeping better, I’ve got more energy and just feel generally great. However, I feel like its time for the next step – that I can do things better.

So first things first – the obvious one. This is a new start on an old promise. Before I got pregnant, I promised David I would lose 4st before we started trying for a baby. Rowan had other ideas though, coming as a nice surprise. I had lost around a stone and a half, and thankfully didn’t put on too much when pregnant etc. Thanks to breastfeeding (but no thanks to lots and lots and lots of biscuits) I’m now back down to the lightest I’ve been (several times) over the last 10 years, give or take a pound or two. So only another 2.5st or so to go. The nice thing about it this time is that I’m not starting from my heaviest, as I have before. And I’m happy for this to take the whole year. At the end of it, I’ll be hoping to have some discussion with David about #2.

Fitness is another one that I’ve done before and of course its a clichéd resolution. Before I got pregnant I was the fittest I have ever, ever been. I could run a good portion of 5k, and it was getting easier and easier. When I got pregnant though, I was pretty scared of doing something to hurt the baby, so stopped running (that bit was sensible as I looked like a beetroot after every run and there was a real danger of overheating) and also stopped exercising generally (which was bad, and over the top!) Again, its different this time because I know I can do it – and the lighter I get, the easier it all gets. Fitness wise I am planning to walk – for one of Rowan’s naps, with him in the sling for extra ballast – for at least an hour, for around 5 days a week, then when the weather picks up, Jenny and Helen are going to chivvy me along with a running program for us all. I’m not planning to use the gym this time as its very difficult with Rowan, but I might do an aqua-aerobics class or similar if I can fit it in. I want to be running 5k by the end of this year, so that if we do have another baby in 2010 I’ve got a good fitness level to start from and can keep it up with lots of walking and other gentle exercise.

My other resolutions are generally about my time management. I’ve been used to having plenty of time to myself, and have generally wasted a lot on trivial things. I still do – although of necessity less than I used to – and I want to cut down on that and make better use of my time in various ways:

• Less Mumsnet / Facebook

Mumsnet is invaluable to me as a support resource, but I do spend too long reading stuff just as something to do – because its more interesting than washing up or put the clothes out to dry. I’m going to limit myself to a few threads I post on regularly, and a little time in the evenings. This means no laptop in the morning, (emails only perhaps if I’m not going to work that morning). Facebook is often just a waste of my time, but good for keeping in touch with friends, so I need to cut down on that too.

• Be Prepared! (like a good girl guide!)

When I am well organised I plan each week’s menu, have an internet shopping delivery for that food, and often cook the dinner the night before (where possible). I want to do this every week, not just every so often. If I can’t do dinner the night before, I may well be able to give Rowan his breakfast in the kitchen and at least do some veg prep in the morning. I also want to use this morning time to make sure we all have a healthy lunch ready for the day ahead.

• Do more around the house

David does a lot of the housework. A bit more than his fair share – and I’ve always admitted this. In order to free up his time so that he’s not pressured when work gets busy again, and so that he can continue to spend more time with Rowan as he has been since we moved office, I’d like to do some more of this. I feel Rowan’s got a lot out of his extra time with Daddy, so want it to continue. So in the time when I would have been messing around on my laptop, I shall instead do something useful around the house.

• Spend my evenings constructively

I have two businesses – one is covered by Jenny looking after Rowan – and that’s generally enough time to get everything done. The second is one I’ve invested a bit of money in and would like to step up in the new year. That means work on the website, SEO stuff, possibly expanding my product range, but definitely making sure that everything I do have is on the site. I haven’t been doing that and its a wasted opportunity. I should be able to make money out of the web side of things, without cutting in to Rowan’s time.

• Make sure my time with Rowan is quality time

I don’t mean spending all day on my hands and knees building towers with him, I just mean more interaction. Perhaps one or two less baby groups, and a bit more time with me and him doing normal things together – he actually likes most housework – particularly the hoovering and washing side of things (sorting those clothes is fun!) so I can get him more involved in that rather than sitting at my laptop and interacting with him every few minutes (I don’t do this all the time, but more than I feel I should)

So there it is. It seems like a lot to do this year, but mostly they are small changes that should make me more productive and my life more fulfilling. We’ll see. Oh, and I want to blog more – this should be an interesting year, so I’d like to keep a record of it, and my changing relationship with my beautiful, wonderful son.