I’ve been rereading my book about life with a breastfeeding toddler and I found the section on fathers amusing, realising I have never once been subjected to criticism from David about our continued breastfeeding. Nothing but support, whether I want to feed Rowan in public to settle him, or if I’ve just had enough and need to be taken out of the equation for a while (sometimes there are complaints about other things that need doing, but never about the fact that I need a break from an activity that I chose to persue). All the suggestions in the book about how a father can help are things that David does. Not always without being asked and certainly not without complaints at times, but when I really need it, the support is there. I thank him for it, and perhaps one day Rowan will because without him there would be far more times when I felt unable to meet Rowan’s needs.

So today I give thanks. For my husband – the best Daddy a wife could hope for – and for my son, a constantly suprising, endearing, challenging, loving little soul. I do appreciate you both even if sometimes it may not feel like it

I’m going to put a very short disclaimer here about medical reasons to wean early. If you’ve been told by a GP, paediatrician etc to wean early for conditions such as reflux, I’m not going to comment. You need to rely on your health professional (if you’ve been told you need to wean because you have a “hungry” or “big” baby, please get a second opinion)

When to Wean?
Traditionally, people have been told to wean when their baby wakes more often for milk (that would be the 4 month growth spurt), and when they are showing more interest in your food (just at the time when they’re showing more interest in everything, coincidentally)

The real signs of readiness for weaning are:
– being able to sit with minimal aid (e.g. hold themselves up straight in high chair to support chewing (chomping/gumming initially)/swallowing of food
– ability to put food in their mouth (often grabbing from a plate!)
– loss of tongue thrust reflex (they don’t push food out of their mouths automatically)

Whether you are puree feeding, or following Baby Led Weaning, the same signs of readiness apply. Rowan showed these at 23 weeks, so he was given food.

Why not wean earlier?
Some time between 17 and 26 weeks, the lining in your baby’s gut seals, making it able to properly digest solid foods. If you feed your baby solids before 26 weeks – or before they are showing the signs given, that are generally believed to happen at the same time as gut maturity, you are risking issues with digestive conditions and allergies later in life. I’m not a doctor or a scientist. I can’t explain how these things work, but you can read a bit more about why to wait here. Kellymom is a highly respected site for breastfeeding resources where articles are supported by medical and other references. Please note that even though that list is very breastfeeding focussed, the non-breastfeeding-related reasons are still very important and valid.
So basically, if you wean before 17 weeks, your baby’s gut will not be ready to digest the food you’re giving it. If you wean sometime before 26 weeks, you’re taking a risk (as I did) that it might not be ready.

If you do decide to wean before 26 weeks, you’re weighing up risks against benefits. Whatever you may be getting out of weaning early (apart from a hell of a lot of extra work, especially if you’re pureeing a la Annabel Karmel and her weird and wonderful recipe book) has to be balanced against the problems that you child may experience later in life. Often the response on mumsnet to people saying “well I weaned mine at X weeks and they were fine” (as an argument to convince someone else to do the same) is to say that you never know what health problems your child will have until they’ve got to the end of their lives!

If people have weaned early (between 17-26 weeks), then there’s nothing to feel guilty about – you were following the advice you had been given, and you never know what will influence your child’s health in the future. Once it has passed, its just another of those parental decisions that you took in good faith – you just keep on doing the best for your child, like we all do.

Of course, if you’re trying to shovel baby rice into a tiny (maybe 12 week old) baby because you think it will help the poor thing sleep better, I am going to stick my neck out here and say that unless you are truly ignorant of the weaning guidelines, I have neither respect nor sympathy for you.

We had a nice day, although I did feel a bit like David, I and the nice lady from the BfN were the only ones running around most of the time, we have made ourselves noticed and have plans for next year!

We’re still looking for a wet weather venue, but we have the main location and can advertise it.  Please read more about the legislation here and the picnics here

If you wish you knew you were protected by law when feeding your child in public, please come along.  Bring a rug, a picnic, and if you have one (or more) your breastfeeding child.  If you’re not a breastfeeding mother, but just want to show your support, please come along too!

Breastfeeding in public is not indiscreet.  We are not flaunting our bodies nor exposing ourselves.  We are feeding our hungry babies.  Babies that need us nearby.  Babies that don’t feed on a timetable and who don’t understand ‘later’.  It is not appauling that we do this, it is natural.

Should we leave our precious babies with those useful baby sitters?  Should we stay at home until our baby may no longer need a feed?  No, we should get on with our lives.  It is people like you that make women too nervous to feed in public, and who endanger the breastfeeding of some of the few women who continue.  Well done you.

Now I shall go and feed my own baby, in the privacy of my home.  But tomorrow I’ll make sure to do it somewhere nice and public, and think of you, you ignorant, arrogant man.